to Know if You Have Met the Right Person For Marriage
Copyright 2011 Heaven
Ministries ~ Marriage Preparation Ministry
Statistics now show that 60 percent of marriages
fail. Why do you think that is? It is because we are not marrying
suitable people. If a person exploits you and disrespects you during the
courtship / dating period, what makes you think anything is going to
change after marrying them?
During the “getting to know one another” stage
of the relationship do they care more about what they can receive from
you than getting to know you? Do they care more about what you have, how
you look, or what you do for a living than the person within? These
things are all very superficial and do not matter for having a loving
and stable marriage.
Building A Firm Marriage Foundation Before
If your relationship starts out as a sexual
relationship but never develops into anything else and you marry them,
what will the relationship be based on? Lust and desire are not emotions
that we should base our marriage on. Having sex with someone before
getting married does not guarantee marital success. But getting to know
someone’s character and seeing they have moral convictions about
marriage purity does!
Marrying someone with lots of money and stuff will
not guarantee marriage happiness, but marrying someone because you both
live comparable lifestyles in Jesus Christ does! Marrying someone
because they are good-looking does not guarantee happiness ever after,
but marrying people who are committed to staying married, no matter
The bottom line is we need to marry people who
share our same beliefs in Jesus Christ. Just because two people
“say” they are Christians does not mean they are compatible people.
One person’s faith may be VERY different than another person’s
faith. Know who you are marrying!
The root of the problem for failing marriages is
that they do not start off right to begin with. Without a firm
foundation to support the marriage on, it cannot survive, hence divorce
or at the very least an unhappy marriage. We
need to start off our relationships on something tangible and true! God
and His principles are something we can hang onto when times are tough
in our marriage, but feelings of lust and desire diminish with time and
will not be around to help us when we are having marriage difficulties.
Why are we so superficial in our relationships? Why
are we jumping into marriage with such fairytale images of happiness
ever after? I think it is because we have not been taught how to find
suitable marriage spouses from our parents and because we aren’t
waiting on God. We seriously need to pray about our friendships with the
opposite sex and never take our focus off of the reason we are able to
even love another properly in the first place. If Christ had not
sacrificed his life for ours how would we have learned what real love
and forgiveness is all about?
Jesus Christ living in us gives us the fruits to
discern the difference between someone who is only using us and thinks
they want to spend the rest of their life with us, and the person who we
should actually marry. Look for the fruits in others. Fruits do not come
from outside appearances, nobility, status, money, power, etc. But
fruits of the Spirit come from within a person. These are what we need
to look for in a potential marriage spouse.
The fruit of the Spirit
is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
meekness, temperance, against such there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23)