FURTHERMORE then we beseech you, brethren, and exhort you by the Lord Jesus, that as ye have received of us 
how ye ought to walk and to please God, so ye abound more and more.
1 Thessalonians 4:1


FAQ on Godly Courtship 

  1. How can I remain emotionally or sexually pure before marriage in a world that promotes dating and promiscuity?
  2. How will I find a life spouse if I don't date?
  3. What are some of the differences between dating and Godly courtship?
  4. How will I know if someone is the right person for me?
  5. What are the main principles of Godly courtship
  6. Can I email your ministry with my questions? 

How can I remain sexually pure before marriage... ?

Keep your focus on Christ and His principles for your life. Read and study the bible every day. Pray for God to protect you from worldly 
desires that take you away from Him and His will for your life. Some of you may have made some mistakes in your relationships. If you 
are not yet married and have erred in your walk, don't kick yourself too hard. Get back on the path that leads to God and know that you 
are forgiven--God will wipe the slate clean.

For the grace of God that bringeth salvation hath appeared to all men, Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, 
we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present age. Titus 2:11-12

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How will I find a life spouse if I don't date?

This is probably the most popular question people ask because "all they know" is the cultural way of dating. Dating is something that the 
culture has developed over the years. But dating in this way was not always so. Before dating became popular, gentlemen and ladies would 
court one another. Godly courtship is what we teach on this website, which has biblical principles attached to it. The objective: Godly 
courtship works in such a way as to help keep couples from being tempted with one another emotionally and physically. 

It was just a little over a hundred years ago, in the 18th and 19th centuries that it was considered in bad taste for a gentleman to even show 
intimate affection towards a lady unless they were betrothed (engaged) to be married. In fact, if he did so, he was expected to marry her, and 
if he did not marry her he would receive a bad reputation as a womanizer. And if a lady ever showed such affection to a man (flirting) she was 
gossiped about throughout the city and then given a bad reputation, in which Godly men steered away from--they didn't want a wife who flirted 
with men. So what has changed? What has changed is people are turning away from God.

It is God's will that unmarried Christian people conduct themselves in a pure and respectful manner, NOT to arouse passion within one another, 
but to respect each other's bodies and minds. Christians are set apart (sanctified) for doing God's work and pleasing Him with our daily life. If we 
claim to be Christ Ones then we should not be dating but conducting ourselves in a manner that is pleasing to God. 

For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication. That every one of you should know how to possess his 
vessel (body) in sanctification and honour; Not in the lust of the concupiscence, even as the Gentiles, which know not God. That no man go beyond 
and defraud his brother in any matter: because that the Lord is the avenger of all such, as we also have forewarned you and testified. For God hath 
not called us unto uncleanness, but unto holiness. 1 Thessalonians 4:3-6

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Why are some of the differences between dating and Godly courtship?

 

Godly courtship 

Dating

1) Couples are NEVER alone with each other until they are betrothed (engaged) 

2) Keeps emotions in check until there is a commitment to marry, and they get to know each other inside and out

3)Keeps body language in check, never stares or flirts

4) Ladies dress modestly

5) Males are taught from an early age to not look at a woman with disrespect and to love her as he would his own sister

It is God’s will for Christian men to love women, as they were his sisters, with sisterly love and with absolute purity. (1 Timothy 5:2)  

1) Couples like to exclude themselves from others and be alone together, which usually results in sexual relations

2) Couples allow themselves to become too emotionally involved before a commitment or know one another

3) Ogles, stares, flirts, and other flirtatious body language

4) Ladies dress immodestly

5) Males are taught from an early age on in this culture to lust after women

In like manner also. that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array. (Timothy 2:9)

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How will I know if someone is the right person for me ?

I personally know a young Christian woman who truly thought that one of my son's was the right one for her only to be told in a dream that he was not the right one 
for her, so she stopped the relationship. And I'm glad she did before it got out of hand. This kind of wishy washy attitude will prevent you from ever finding 
"the one for you". If we go by these kinds of signs to tell us "who is the right one" we may end up marrying the wrong person.

No one can know for complete certainty who is the right person as a marriage spouse except for God Himself. But I do believe that if we wait on God and 
not be in a hurry with our relationships that God will feed our heart and mind with His wisdom and guidance. He will show us and bless us with a lifetime 
spouse. Sometimes the right one, but the least-likely to us, is the person God would bless you with and you won't know it because you aren't really letting God go 
to work in your personal life. 

Give it to God-have faith to know that He knows what you need and who would be best suited to your needs. God knows our weaknesses and strengths and 
would want us to marry someone who complimented us in our weaknesses and that we strengthen in their weaknesses. Don't be in a rush to get to know 
someone either...let the relationship blossom on its own, and if it was meant to develop from the friendship stage to the courtship stage, God will let your heart 
know. Last word of advice is don't fall back into the dating trap. Read the principles of dating below so as to keep your relationship pure and pleasing to God. 

“I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem, do not stir up or awaken love until it pleases” (Song of Solomon 2:7; 3:5; 8:4). 

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What are the main principles of Godly courtship? 

1) Never be alone with the opposite sex. It does not matter if you are 17 or 32 this is a sound biblical principle that truly keeps couples from being 
tempted with each other

2) Always do things together in groups

3) Do not rush a relationship and give away your heart and mind. Staying pure emotionally keeps us from being heartbroken later on down the road.

4) Get to know someone from the inside out before you decide to move away from the friendship stage and into the courtship stage.  Read our free 
ebook on Godly courtship to find out what to look for in a person's character...

5) Always stay focused on God's will for your life. Live your life to please God, not yourself

6) Read and Study this website for more godly information on how God intends marriage to be

Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth. But shun profane and vain 
babblings: for they will increase to more ungodliness. 2 Timothy 2:15

Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart. (2 timothy 2:22)

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Can I email your ministry with my questions?

Yes! email us from the home page and use the "contact us" link and let us know what is on your mind. 

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Revised: July 23, 2011 .

Copyright © 2010 - 2014 Heaven Ministries ~ Scriptural Romance in Preparation to Marriage
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